


it's funny how the warning signs can feel like they're butterflies

by BundlesOfMinho



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alpha Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups, Alpha Lee Seokmin | DK, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Anxiety Attacks, At first ;), Attempted Sexual Assault, Beta Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Beta Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi, Choi Minki | Ren - Freeform, Cute Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Cuz he’s my bby :))), Hurt/Comfort, Jihoon also has a ton of piercings but it’s only mentioned a few times, Kang Dongho | Baekho - Freeform, Kim Jonghyun | JR - Freeform, Kwak Youngmin | Aron, Lee Jihoon | Woozi-centric, M/M, Mentioned Son Hyunwoo | Shownu, Minor Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Minor Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan, Minor Jeon Wonwoo/Kim Mingyu, Minor Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Seokmin | DK, Minor Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8, Music Major Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups, Music Major Lee Jihoon | Woozi, NU’EST ensamble, Omega Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Producer Lee Jihoon | Woozi, SO, Self-Esteem Issues, Seungcheol is bad at feelings, Soonyoung and Jihoon are Best Friends, Soonyoung is a Good Friend, Unrequited Crush, also, but tbh who doesnt, but then :D, hwang minhyun - Freeform, in high school everyone has a crush on seungcheol, okay why tf is that not a tag, punk!woozi, sorry I wish I mentioned them more but they’re barely there :(((, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23473723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BundlesOfMinho/pseuds/BundlesOfMinho
Summary: "Oh my god." Jeonghan breaks out in laughter, startling him enough to make him drop his hands.“What?"The beta keeps laughing, holding his stomach as he doubles over. Honestly, Seungcheol can’t figure out why he's laughing, so he just waits it out until Jeonghan has relaxed.Eventually, he settles, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes. “You like a guy that you rejected in high school." He takes a deep breath and exhales loudly with a smile. "And now you probably have no chance. This is gold."Pouting, Seungcheol shoves at him. "How is this funny?""Because," Jeonghan says like it's obvious. "Everyone wants to sleep with you, so you never have a problem getting laid. But now—" he breaks out in laughter again, slapping Seungcheol's knee. "Now the one person who's caught your attention is likely not going to ever sleep with you. Karma's a bitch."OrSeungcheol has a way with words; a terrible way.Jihoon gets caught in the crossfire.
Relationships: Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Lee Jihoon | Woozi
Comments: 15
Kudos: 201





	it's funny how the warning signs can feel like they're butterflies

**Author's Note:**

> few things:
> 
> \- in the beginning, they're high schoolers, but after the time skip  
> (the: ** ) they're college students
> 
> trigger warnings:
> 
> \- that Attempted Sexual Assault tag is there for a reason!!!! It involves a bit of groping but no further, and does not occur between jicheol. if it makes you uncomfortable, feel free to skip over it when ”•••” appears and resume after ”•••” appears again
> 
> \- Jihoon also experiences pretty dark spiraling thought processes throughout the fic bc of his self esteem issues (mentioned in the tags as well) just a warning, but it is pretty brief and not terribly detailed in any way, it’s more self deprecating thoughts and stuff but he hits the topic of suicide like once very VERY briefly so I just want to give you guys a heads up
> 
> any who this fic is lowkey inspired by a [ Rickey Thompson video](https://twitter.com/lifeofrickey/status/1138206535295705088?s=20)
> 
> and its a bit cliche, but that’s the way I write and idk why, sorry :)

"Ask him out already!" Soonyoung hisses, pushing at Jihoon's shoulder.

The breeze passing them wafts Seungcheol's scent towards him. Jihoon tries to breathe it in inconspicuously because the alpha is smiling in their direction and he can't have him thinking Jihoon is weird if he were to sniff the air too obviously.

Though scents are a large part of their lives and it really wouldn't be that odd if an omega was affected by an alpha's scent.

"Why would I do that?" Jihoon replies, turning back to face his best friend, reaching for his fries. Soonyoung bats him away but Jihoon snatches one anyway.

"Because, asshole," he says bitterly, moving his fries closer to himself. "Seungcheol is into you!"

The omega pouts, twisting his empty water bottle in his hands. "You don't know that." He states, eyeing the fries. "Seungcheol is just really a nice guy. With everyone!" He quickly adds.

Soonyoung shakes his head, grabbing another fry. "Dude. Have you not noticed the way he looks at you?"

Jihoon purses his lips, tilting his head. "What do you mean?”

The beta groans, sliding his fries to his pouting friend. "He looks like he wants to bite you."

A red flush quickly takes over the pale skin of Jihoon's face almost immediately, but he shakes his head in denial, muttering unintelligible words under his breath as he chews down a fry.

"I'm serious, Jihoon!"

Jihoon chances a glance back at Seungcheol, who's laughing at a joke his friends made at their table.

When Seungcheol relaxes, his eyes meet Jihoon's own across the room and he feels his face heat up once more when the other smiles brightly. He shoots a quick smile back, trying for casual but definitely not succeeding, before he turns back to Soonyoung.

"I'll think about it."

*

Choi Seungcheol was known in their school for several things, he was incredibly popular. Known for his Daegu accent, his place on the soccer team, his handsome face, and his muscles, the alpha had students asking him out left and right.

Often, he'd agree to go on a date with them.

According to Seungcheol, as far as Jihoon's heard, he'll never know if he truly likes someone unless he dates them, so he gives everyone—literally, _everyone_ —a fair shot to allow himself to find someone he's genuinely interested in.

Half of the school has gotten to know him through this method, which means everyone loves him, so how on earth is Jihoon expected to ask him out and actually succeed?

"I swear." Hansol insists. "He likes you! I know he does!"

Jihoon shakes his head, closing his locker. "Look, Hansol, I don't want to ask him out. He'll give me a shot and realize he doesn't like me back, keep our relationship at acquaintance level—at _best_ —and I'll be left to deal with my own feelings." He says honestly.

"How are you so sure he won't like you back?"

Jihoon doesn't want to answer that.

_Because I'm me. Because he's all smiles and sunshine and according to everyone who's ever dated me—I'm a bitter pessimist, too outspoken for an omega._

_He is perfect and I'm..._

"He's never taken anyone out on a second date, what makes you think I'll be the exception?" He voices instead.

"You don't know unless you try, hyung." Hansol shrugs, wrapping him up in a hug. "Jeonghan says he'll be at that party on Saturday."

Jihoon snorts softly into the embrace, pushing the younger away. "And?"

"Well," Hansol hums. "I was thinking I could ask him about you then and tell you later what he says. Maybe it will give you a feel for how he'll reply when you ask him out."

" _If_ I ask him out." Jihoon corrects.

Hansol ruffles his hair with a laugh. "You say that as if it's up for debate." He says before abruptly breaking off to run from the scowling omega.

"What did I say about touching my hair!"

"It looked fluffy, how was I supposed to resist?"

*

"Aw, look at you, Jihoonie." Soonyoung coos. "All dressed up, I didn't think you owned anything else but those big sweaters and jeans of yours."

"Shut the hell up," Jihoon mutters, feeling his face heat.

He uncrosses his arms, reaching for the red solo cup Hansol hands him.

"Is this... beer?" Jihoon asks, face scrunched as he sniffs the cup.

Hansol shrugs, "Dunno. Jackson gave it to me."

"So it's beer," Jihoon confirms, leaning away from it and setting it down on a table.

Soonyoung nudges him hard, causing him to hiss at the jab. "Dude, what—"

"Seungcheol's right over there." He whispers loudly.

"Hold my drink, I'll be right back." Hansol shoves through them, obviously making a beeline towards the alpha.

Nervously, Jihoon looks away, not wanting to know how it will all go down when Hansol approaches Seungcheol, but Soonyoung is quick about relaying what he can see.

"Seungcheol looks confused-oh wait. He's looking over at us now. Don't look, play it cool." He smacks Jihoon as if the omega isn't already trying his best to act natural. "Oh, now he's smiling. Aw, he looks like a puppy when he tilts his head like that."

Now it's Jihoon's turn to smack him.

"Hey!" He whines. "I'm sorry, I'll back off your mans, no need to get violent." Jihoon rolls his eyes. "Hansol is coming back now anyway."

The shorter perks up, turning to face the younger as he joins them.

"I told you!" Hansol whisper-screeches.

Jihoon's eyes widen. "What did he say?"

"If I tell you, what do I get in return?" Hansol asks mischievously. Jihoon smacks him too.

"That wasn't part of the deal!"

"Ow! Okay, fine." He says, rubbing his arm. "I asked him what he thought of you and he said he thinks you're really cute."

Jihoon looks in Seungcheol's direction, cheeks heating up as the other laughs at a joke someone made. "Really?"

"Dude," Soonyoung whines, "ask him out!"

"We've been telling you since the beginning of the year that he likes you and now you have your answer. What are you waiting for?" Hansol asks and Jihoon thinks that's a really good question.

He doesn't know the answer to it.

"I'll ask him at the end of graduation practice, after our finals on Thursday." He says, determined. "That way whatever happens after I ask him doesn't distract me from the exams."

"Finally!" Hansol cries over his last few words, bursting like he's been holding his excitement in. Soonyoung cheers and laughs, pulling him into a side hug.

"Guys!" Jihoon hisses. "Stop embarrassing me."

"No one's paying attention, Jihoonie," Soonyoung says, waving his complaints off before shoving him forward. "Now let's go dance!"

*

Asking your crush out is a difficult task whether you know if they like you back or not. So, even when Jihoon knows Seungcheol thinks he's attractive, he's terrified beyond belief when graduation practice ends and his class disperses quickly to leave school grounds.

Seungcheol is on his way out of the gates to the soccer field when Jihoon finds him and calls out to him. "Seungcheol-ssi!"

The alpha looks up from his phone, searching for who called him before he meets Jihoon's gaze. "Jihoon-ssi, hey!" He greets with a smile.

God, Jihoon is a sucker for that beautiful smile.

"Hi." He returns shyly. He clears his throat, forgetting everything he'd practiced this morning as Seungcheol approaches.

"What's up?"

"Um." Jihoon stutters to find words. "I was wondering if maybe you'd like to get some coffee with me. Like—on a date." He adds for clarification.

It's been a few days since the party last weekend and, with the way Seungcheol hesitates, Jihoon is starting to wonder whether he imagined it all.

"Um, Jihoon, look—" The anxiety within Jihoon begins to rise faster, his stomach twisting as he realizes those words aren't a great sign. "I'm flattered. But I'm not... interested." Seungcheol says softly, trying not to hurt his feelings.

Even if it isn't his intention, Jihoon can't help the sudden molten burn of humiliation behind his cheeks and _pain_ as his chest twists unpleasantly.

"Oh." He stutters. "Um, I. Seungcheol I don't understand, I thought— Hansol told me you thought—"

"You're cute." The alpha interrupts. "And it's true, what I told him. I think you're really cute— in fact, I think you're adorable. But," he sighs. "How can I put this?" He mumbles, pushing his hair back from his brows.

"You're cute in a _kitten_ -cute kind of way." He continues slowly. "I can't really see you as a cute- _date-able_ way."

And Seungcheol knows he's worded that all wrong, but it's already out of his mouth and he can't think of anything more honest, it’s the only way he can really think to word it.

Jihoon tries to ignore the way his throat constricts and the way his eyes water, but his voice cracks too noticeably to be ignored. "What?"

"Wait." Seungcheol interrupts, feeling guilty at the crestfallen omega. "No. No wait, I said that all wrong. Jihoon, I just mean—"

"It's—" Jihoon's voice cracks once again, embarrassingly. The omega turns away to hide his flaming face. "It's fine, I get it." He says abruptly, trying not to let the tears in his eyes show. "I'll just go. See you tomorrow."

And with that, he practically bolts towards the school parking lot.

Seungcheol stands in place, regretting that entire conversation. But there isn't much he can do now, and it won't matter much what he does anyway. Tomorrow they graduate and likely aren't going to see each other again after that. It takes a few deep breaths, but he manages to shrug it off and make his way to his own car.

**

"I hate rooming with you two," Jihoon grumbles, kicking aside one of Hansol's t-shirts. "Do you guys ever do laundry?"

"You want some popcorn?" Hansol asks, offering him a bowl instead of answering the question.

"Since when do we have popcorn?" The omega asks, scrunching his nose.

"Found it under my bed," Hansol replies with a shrug. "It's a few months past expiration but I popped it for ten minutes and it's still good."

"I'll pass." The older says, grabbing his jacket. "I'm gonna run out real quick to buy some milk. You should do your laundry, classes start tomorrow and you can't just grab something to wear off the floor."

Hansol flinches as he throws a piece of popcorn in the air and it lands on his face. "I'll do it later, let me finish my food."

"Throw that out before you get sick." Jihoon scolds, smacking the beta's head on his way out.

"It's still good though!" Jihoon sighs but doesn't reply to that.

He makes his way out of the apartment in no rush, trying to run through his mind what kind of breakfast foods he could grab for the week along with the milk he intends to buy. And then where he'll hide his beloved sugar cookies from Soonyoung and Hansol because those are his! They cannot take his cookies.

When he arrives at the grocery store a few blocks down, he greets the cashier who welcomes him.

The guy is attractive and super sweet from Jihoon's previous interactions with him. With their apartment so close, he sees the cashier relatively often, whenever it's his turn to buy groceries.

He grabs a few boxes of granola bars, pop tarts, a bag of bagels, milk and a few other breakfast items along with his cookies before going to the check out area.

"Hey, Hyunwoo-ssi." Jihoon greets, loading the food on the conveyor belt.

"Hey, Jihoon-ssi, how are you?"

The omega shrugs, smiling. "I'm alright, the semester is starting up so I figured I'd buy some food before going completely broke from the textbooks." He jokes.

"I hear that. My first class started today."

"Really? What do you major in?" Jihoon asks in curiosity.

"Accounting." Hyunwoo laughs at Jihoon's expression of horror. "It's not all that bad. I quite like it." He says.

Jihoon snorts. "You nerd." Hyunwoo smiles sheepishly, bagging his last item.

"Here's your receipt. And um, hey." He stops Jihoon in his tracks. "Um. I was wondering—and you don't have to give me an answer right now, I'm sure you want to get home soon, but uh. I was wondering if you'd like to get coffee sometime?"

Jihoon blinks in surprise, his lips turning up at the corners. "Really?"

Hyunwoo smiles. "Yeah. I think you're really cute and there's this little coffee shop on the corner of..." But Jihoon's face has fallen at the mention of 'cute'. Suddenly, he really does want to go home. Maybe wrap himself up in his favorite blanket and eat his cookies.

"That sounds really great, Hyunwoo. And I would love to. But I'm not sure if I'm looking to date right now, I'm sorry." He says sincerely.

Hyunwoo doesn't take it too harshly, he nods in understanding and tells him that he hopes maybe someday they can grab coffee anyway, even if it isn't a date, and Jihoon appreciates that.

He walks out of the grocery store feeling a little glad about Hyunwoo and a little thrown off by what he said.

It's already been four years since he graduated high school, truthfully he should be over what he had said, but he can't seem to shake it off.

He doesn't want to date people who think he's cute, he's afraid they'll realize he's not what they hoped for. Because he isn't cute, he's rather grumpy and tends to annoy himself more often than not.  
  
But, personality aside, people who also call him adorable make him feel like they want to pet him. What is he a fucking cat?

He wants to date someone who thinks he's sexy because he's almost twenty-two and, damn it, he's pretty hot.

He didn't get all these piercings and start wearing tighter jeans and shorter tops so people could call him _cute_. He's far from the sweater-paws-Jihoon from high school and he'd like to be sexy for once.

Yet, even when he and Soonyoung and Hansol go out to drink and he's dressed like a stripper, Jihoon hears his partners call him cute and precious and adorable. It makes him want to either lash out or hide away and cry.

_"You're cute in a kitten-cute kind of way. I can't really see you as a cute-date-able way."_

If people think he's cute it means they don't want to fuck, or it means they only want to fuck. But it never means they want to date.

*

"You are not going to need your textbooks for this class. I know it said it was required for this course, but..." the professor drones as the class comes to an end. Jihoon can already tell he's going to hate this class.

After this class, though, he has a music programming class he's excited for.

"You are dismissed." And Jihoon cannot rush out of that room faster if he tried.

He's memorized where the music and arts building is, considering his major largely revolves around it, so he's quick to find his class and settles in with the few who have arrived early like himself.

He takes a seat somewhere in the middle section, too anxious to walk all the way to the back but too afraid to sit in the front, and he pulls out his materials.

The class doesn't start for another eight minutes so he checks his phone for messages and emails to busy himself.

When the teachers calls their attention, he's erased all of his notifications and prepares himself mentally for the teacher to take attendance alphabetically.

"Choi Seungcheol." She calls, and Jihoon almost doesn't catch it, so focused on waiting to hear his own name. But when it registers, Jihoon's blood feels like ice.

He hears a voice reply but doesn't turn to check who it was.

It could be any other Choi Seungcheol, this guy might be some complete stranger, but Jihoon can't help but think it's not. It's star-soccer-captain-from-high-school-Choi-Seungcheol. The guy who crushed him at the end of senior year and the guy who Jihoon cannot, for the love of God, _blame_ for his change in appearance and plummeting self-consciousness (because he only has himself to blame).

He won't look to see.

"Lee Jihoon."

The omega squeaks out a startled, "Here!" His face heating up in embarrassment. 

Now he wishes for nothing more than for this class to be over.

It's an hour-long class and Jihoon has barely made it into the first ten minutes, he wonders if he could just drop it now and take it next year but he really doesn't want to pay for the class twice.

He takes a deep breath. Jihoon knows he is likely making this a bigger deal than it is. He still hasn't chanced a glance at Choi Seungcheol, so it still could be a stranger. And who's to say that, even if it is high-school-Seungcheol, that the guy remembers him?

He was a fairly popular guy, he probably doesn't even remember Jihoon at all.

With that thought, Jihoon takes another deep breath and settles back in his chair, focusing on the teacher instead of the familiar scent that floods his senses.

He ignores it as best he can.

When the class is over, he runs out of the room as fast as he can.   
  


*

Lee Jihoon is just as adorable as Seungcheol remembers. But, fuck. If he isn't the hottest guy he's ever seen.

How the hell is he supposed to connect high-school-Jihoon to _this_ Jihoon?

The omega's jeans look almost painted on, perfectly accentuating his legs; the crop top he wore had Seungcheol drooling before he even caught sight of the tiny belly button ring and the dozens of little hoops decorating his ears.

He wasn't even sitting all that close to the guy and yet, he was able to spot the tiny lip piercing from where he sat when Jihoon's name was called for attendance.

Damn. How is he supposed to survive this class with a distraction like that?

Hint: He can't. He doesn't even realize class has been dismissed until the pretty little omega in his sights dashes for the door.

Blinking out of his daze, Seungcheol collects his things and packs them away, walking out with his mind whirling a hundred miles a minute.

It's been years since he saw the younger, but the change in appearance is so drastic, Seungcheol can't seem to wrap his mind around it.

"What are you doing?" Jeonghan asks, face a little disturbed as he catches up with him. Seungcheol's brows scrunch.

"I'm thinking about something."

Jeonghan's look melts away to a worried expression. "That's not good. Don't hurt yourself."

The alpha shoves him away playfully, "Shut up, you ass."

Jeonghan laughs, throwing an arm over his shoulders. "Please do enlighten me, what is the infamous Seungcheol so distracted thinking about?"

Shrugging, Seungcheol looks off to the distance. "Do you remember Lee Jihoon from high school?"

The beta thinks for a second before he hums affirmatively. "He was the one guy, the cute little beta, who was friends with Hansol, right? The kid with the big sweaters and whatever."

Seungcheol tilts his head. "He was an omega. But yeah, that's him.”

"Oooh," Jeonghan says, teasingly. "I think I know where this is going."

"Yeah?" Seungcheol asks. "'Cause I kind of don't.”

"Did you see him again or something?" Jeonghan asks, hitting the nail right on the head.

The alpha tries to maintain expressionless as he nods. "He's in my music programming class. He... looks— _different_ from high school."

Jeonghan smiles knowingly. "He's hotter, isn't he?"

Seungcheol knows his face is an obvious shade of red, but he shrugs it off, casually. "I suppose he is attractive."

At that, Jeonghan smiles, soft and maybe a little wistful.

"What?" Seungcheol asks, nudging him. He opens the door to the cafe they approach.

The beta shrugs, smile widening to show a sliver of his perfect, pearl white teeth. "Lee Jihoon..." he whispers, mostly to himself. "I remember he had the biggest crush on you and every one of his friends would tease him about it. It feels like it was just yesterday, but it's been like four years. That's crazy."

Seungcheol can't help the sheepish smile that emerges from Jeonghan's words. Jihoon liked him? But his best friend seems to see his train of thought and stops him before he can get ahead of himself.

"That doesn't mean he still likes you, though." He scolds, hitting the alpha playfully. "It _has_ been four years, he might not even remember high school. He could very well be just like you and have forgotten everything except what _I_ can get you to remember."

Frowning, Seungcheol shoves at him a little. "Shut up, I remember a lot from high school." Jeonghan gives him a look. "I _do_!"

"Okay then." Jeonghan crosses his arms, taking a seat at one of the couches in the shop. "Tell me, what do you remember about Jihoon?"

Seungcheol wants to remain standing because he's about to go order, but he sits so he doesn't draw attention. "That's not fair. I never really knew Jihoon. I just kind of knew him from a distance."

Jeonghan rolls his eyes, waving him away. "Go order, we'll continue this when you get back." Seungcheol huffs, tempted to stomp his foot as he stands, just for the sake of it, but he's grown, he knows Jeonghan would absolutely call him a child if he did. Not that he will, he's a _man_.

So he gets up and walks to the counter, ready to order his usual and maybe a bagel because he skipped breakfast and he's hungry as fuck.

"Choi Seungcheol!" A familiar voice calls. The alpha in question looks up to the cashier who called his name.

"Hong Jisoo," Seungcheol states, the name lilting like a question because he almost second guesses himself. The omega beams back, almost bouncing in place.

"Long time no see. Did you just transfer here?"

Glancing behind him to make sure he isn't holding up the line, only to see no one, Seungcheol turns back to Jisoo. "Yeah, I've been in town for a few weeks. Did you just start working here? My friends have been meeting up here since before I transferred, they never mentioned you working here."

"I just started working day shifts, my classes are mostly in the evening now so I had to work my schedule around it. I don't mind it." Jisoo smiles, shrugging.

"That's good. Maybe you could come hang out with us when your shift is over?" Seungcheol suggests, gesturing to where Jeonghan is sitting in the corner.

Jisoo ducks his head, but Seungcheol can clearly see the blush on his cheeks. "Sure, that sounds nice." He almost stutters. "I haven't seen you guys since high school, it'll be nice to catch up."

Seungcheol nods, smile molding into a smirk. "Jeonghan will be so excited to see you again."

Hearing the teasing tone, Jisoo makes to smack him playfully. "Oh, hush. What can I get you?" Seungcheol gives him his order and thanks him before going to wait for it at the end of the counter.

"You didn't get me anything?" Jeonghan pouts as Seungcheol returns.

"You didn't ask for anything." The alpha shrugs, taking his seat. "If you want something you gotta go order it yourself." He smiles slyly behind his mug. If he remembers anything from high school, it's the mutual pinning of Jisoo and Jeonghan.

"Later," Jeonghan says, batting at Seungcheol's knee. "You were just telling me how much you remember of Jihoon."

"And it's not much." Seungcheol agrees, setting his drink down.

Jeonghan rolls his eyes, sighing dramatically. "What that poor boy ever saw in you is beyond me." He drapes himself over the couch, throwing his legs over Seungcheol's lap. "You had to have interacted at one point if he liked you so much, right?"

Seungcheol shrugs, "I guess. I think we worked together in some school projects, but that was definitely in middle school or something, not high school. Though I'm pretty sure we had classes together throughout high school. I know we had the same lunch period in our senior year—"

"Did he ever get around to asking you out?" Jeonghan interrupts his voiced thought process. "I know Hansol told me he was going to, but that was towards the end of the year, I never found out if he ever did."

Seungcheol tries to think back to high school, which shouldn't require as much effort as it does, but he can't really remember anything about Jihoon asking him out. So many of his classmates asked him out throughout high school, he doesn't think he could remember if Jihoon did. But if he did, Seungcheol would probably have dated him at one point, as he did with everyone. "No, I don't think he ever did..." but as he says it, his chest becomes heavy. He feels like he's forgetting something. "I'm not—"

And it comes back to him.

"Really? I was so sure he would try, with the way his friends would encourage him to—" he cuts Jeonghan off.

"He did." He groans and throws his head back onto the couch.

"Hey!" Jeonghan whines. "You told me you'd always tell me when you dated someone."

"Yeah, but I _didn't_ date him," Seungcheol states, words falling like weights between them.

The other looks at him confused. "What do you mean? You dated everyone who asked you out—because, _according_ to you, you never knew if you could like them back if you didn't try. Which was the dumbest logic because everyone had a fat crush you in high school, which is still mind-blowing to me—" Jeonghan stops abruptly. "If he asked you out and you _didn't_ date him... what did you...?"

Seungcheol groans louder, covering his face with his hands.

"Oh my god." Jeonghan breaks out in laughter, startling him enough to make him drop his hands.

"What?"

The beta keeps laughing (read: hollering), holding his stomach as he doubles over. Honestly, Seungcheol cannot figure out why he's laughing, so he just waits it out until Jeonghan has relaxed.

Eventually, he settles, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes. "You like a guy that _you_ rejected in high school." He takes a deep breath and exhales loudly with a smile. "And now you probably have no chance. This is _gold_." 

Pouting, Seungcheol shoves at him. "How is this funny?"

"Because," Jeonghan says like it's obvious. "Everyone wants to sleep with you, so you never have a problem getting laid. But _now_ —" he breaks out in laughter again, slapping Seungcheol's knee. "Now the _one_ person who's caught your attention is likely not going to _ever_ sleep with you. Karma's a _bitch_."

Seungcheol pouts even more dramatically, but before he gets a chance to reply, he's interrupted.

"Hey, guys. My shifts over so I figured I would take you up on your offer and—" Jisoo sets down a plate and smiles kindly as he takes a seat. "I brought muffins!"

Seungcheol thanks him and nudges at a speechless Jeonghan to do the same.

"Oh," the beta stutters. "I-thank you, Jisoo. _Wow_." He says breathlessly, staring at the poor, blushing omega. Seungcheol nudges him again, so he can get his act together.

"What was that about karma?" The alpha whispers to him cockily. Jeonghan snaps out of his trance to smack him before turning back to Jisoo.

"It's so nice to see you again—you look good. Great—you look _great_ , Jisoo." He corrects. "Not that you weren't really handsome in high school because you were, but wow. You look amazing, you're all grown up now."

Jisoo tries to hide his embarrassment. "We're the same age, Hannie."

And Seungcheol can practically hear the stutter in Jeonghan's heartbeat—no wait, that's just the stuttering of his words. Seungcheol bites his lip to keep from bursting into laughter, standing to leave.

"I guess I should leave you two alone." He mutters, ducking out of the bubble they've made, but Jisoo and Jeonghan don't even seem to notice.

He throws his trash out and pushes through the cafe doors, making his way back to his dorm. He's left his headphones at home, so he's really only left to his own thoughts. And all he can think about Jihoon which, consequently, means thinking back to what happened in high school.

He'd honestly forgotten, until now, that Lee Jihoon had asked him out the day before their graduation. There was so much going on at the time, finals, graduation practice, actual graduation, and then summer where he didn't think of anything but planning his move to college. He thinks that's part of why he'd forgotten it all.

He'd forgotten how the omega had very boldly and yet, very nervously, asked him out.

He'd forgotten that he'd rejected Lee Jihoon altogether. 

But he partially forgot because he's never really rejected anyone.

Frowning, he tucked his hands into his pockets. He can't remember what he told Jihoon, why he said no, but he vividly remembers the face the omega made—how _hurt_ he looked. He cringes, biting at his lip anxiously.

Now he thinks Jihoon is hot, but that really isn't fair on his behalf. Why would he reject someone based on their looks? And now want to try to win them over because they've glowed up?

Yeah, that's really shallow of him.

He can't even understand why he said no back then, he remembers Jihoon being just as cute as he is now—what changed?

It doesn't matter, he doesn't want to be a dick and try to win over someone he's already hurt. It's not fair.

The face of hurt flashes in his memory again, the tears brimming at Jihoon's eyes. He tries to remember what it is he said, but he comes up blank. All he knows is that he immediately regretted whatever it was, because how can anyone ever _purposefully_ hurt Jihoon? What kind of monster would make him _cry_? 

It hurts just remember how sad Jihoon was. He wants to go back in time and scold high-school-Seungcheol because _what the hell?_

Taking a deep breath, he makes his decision, nodding to himself as he approaches his dorm building.

He won't interact with Jihoon at all, he won't try to approach him or initiate any kind of contact.

He will not allow himself to hurt the omega again.  
  


*

Immediately, his plan goes to shit.

Jihoon tries his best, really he does. He tries to avoid Seungcheol in every way possible; leaving class as fast as he can, asking to do projects alone, sitting right in the front row, where no one else dares to sit. He hides away in his dorm or his booked studio most of the time so he doesn't have to worry about running into Seungcheol _at all_ outside of class. And it works.

For about a week or so and then it goes to shit.

Because he can't keep _his friends_ from bumping into the alpha.

So when Soonyoung decides to go clubbing one Friday night, Hansol and himself tag along and meet up with Seungkwan and Chan; who brings along his roommate, Jun, who brings his boyfriend, Minghao, who is best friends with Mingyu, who brings _his_ boyfriend Wonwoo, and Wonwoo brings his roommate, Seungcheol.

_What the fuck._

This is _not_ what he signed up for.

As a big group, he doesn't _need_ to interact with the alpha at all, but Soonyoung disappeared with Chan somewhere and the rest of the group is here with a boyfriend or a crush, so they all pair up and ignore the rest of the world.

He fucking hates being alone, especially at a club because of how many sleazy alphas stare at him and approach him, without the scent of a mate on him to shoo them away. But with the way the night seems to be going, it looks like he'll be alone.

It's barely nine pm, he's been here for about forty minutes and he's rejected and had to push off at least six alphas as it is—he's just ready to go home. But, with most of his friends drunk or tipsy, he guesses he'll have to be the responsible one to stay regretfully sober and take all of them home. Why couldn't he have been the first to get drunk so he wouldn't be tasked with this? 

He manages to find a booth in the back corner of the club to hideaway in, sipping at his coke that is meant to keep him awake. His eyelids feel heavy despite it being rather early—but he shouldn't be surprised; it's probably because he stayed up last night to finish a project. He tries to blink away the sleep, distracting himself by playing a claw game app on his phone to keep him from falling asleep.

"Hey, I brought you another drink."

Jihoon looks up at the voice that seems to be addressing him but is caught off guard by the person sliding into the booth next to him, throwing their arm over his shoulder.

The omega tenses, smelling the alpha scent and, without processing what is happening, he shoves the person away. "I'm not intereste—"

"Just play along," the alpha hisses, "that alpha over there has been watching you all night and it's starting to freak me out a little."

_Seungcheol_. His mind thinks, finally looking at the alpha's face.

"Yeah?" Jihoon asks, trying to hide how flustered he is, masking it with annoyance. "They tend to do that, _alphas_ have been bothering me all night." He says pointedly.

Seungcheol's head turns from where he was watching the alpha across the room to face him. "I'm just trying to look out for you." He defends.

Jihoon sighs impatiently. "I don't need you to do that. I'm perfectly capable of watching out for myself, I haven't even had a drink, so I'm not worried."

Humming, Seungcheol doesn't draw his arm back from where it lies over Jihoon's shoulders.

That is until Jihoon pushes it off himself and scooches closer to the wall, away from the other.

Seungcheol meets his eyes immediately, looking very serious. "Look. I'm really trying to help you out here, you pushing me away is _not_ helping me. Just go along with it."

Something in his tone makes Jihoon bristle. "I don't need your help." He says angrily. "I'm not defenseless, and I definitely don't need some _alpha_ , acting like he _owns_ me, to tell me what to do."

Seungcheol looks taken aback, his eyes focusing from whatever haze was in front of him before. He clears his throat and backs up a bit to give him space, face dusting pink. "I'm sorry, you're right. I shouldn't be telling you what to do. But you gotta admit that it's safer if I sit here with you, at least. So they stop bothering you. Or _worse_."

Jihoon opens his mouth to reply but shuts it and chooses to stay quiet. _You wouldn't think, someone who didn't think I was attractive, would think someone else would want to sleep with me._

It's self-deprecating, but he knows it's true. Seungcheol didn't think he was attractive enough to date him, why would he think any other alpha wanted to? And anyway, why would he care?

The thought hurts more than he thought it would, even though he's certain he's over all of that. He's over Seungcheol. He hasn't seen him in years, hasn't thought about him in months. He doesn't care about Seungcheol or his dumb opinions anymore.

But he knows he can't fool himself.

Seungcheol is just as hot—if not, hotter—than he was in high school. Jihoon can't help but think the alpha is attractive, he can't help but want to try to make himself more appealing so that the alpha thinks the same as he does. But he knows that won't happen.

The amount of times he's heard an alpha call him cute—tonight, _alone_ —means that he'll never meet Seungcheol's standards. He'll always be _cute_ , never hot. He's still that fucking kitten people want to pet, not dateable, definitely not fuckable.

He tries not to slump in his seat as he turns away from Seungcheol—or, at least, the view of him from his peripheral vision, and ducks to keep playing on his phone.

They spend the next few minutes like that, maybe a half-hour, sitting in silence, before Jihoon excuses himself to use the bathroom; having the alpha scooch out of the booth so he can get out.

And when he's done using the restroom, he definitely doesn't double-check his outfit and fix it up a bit just to impress Seungcheol. He doesn't. He just thinks his zip-up hoodie could be left open to show off his favorite baby blue crop top, and that maybe he could go home with someone if they see his piercing and find him hot instead of cute.

People think belly button piercings are hot, right?

He makes his way back to the booth, ducking away from flirty betas and bold alphas. But there's one that stops him in his path, standing right in front of him when he's about two meters away from his table.

"Hey there, can I treat you to a drink?" The older alpha asks, biting his lip seductively. Jihoon tries to shake his head, not really interested in the guy. He's handsome, but he isn't really his type, so he apologizes and tries walk past him, but the guy catches him around the waist and tugs him towards his chest.

"Come on, just one drink, cutie. After that, I'll leave you alone."

Jihoon frowns, pushing at the arm holding him. "No thanks, I need to get back to my friend."

"It won't take long—"

Suddenly, Jihoon lurches forward, stumbling into someone's chest as he's tugged from the alpha. "Sorry, he's not interested."

Jihoon hates this.

"Who are you?" The alpha asks, crossing his arms impatiently.

"His boyfriend, now fuck off." Typical.

It's so fucking cliche for Seungcheol to do this, he can fend for himself, damn it! He doesn't need the other to fake being his boyfriend, and he definitely does _not_ go along with it by burying his face into the older's chest. His nose is just itchy, okay?

"I don't smell an alpha's scent on him." But Seungcheol doesn't bother to stick around to reply, he just turns away and heads for the dance floor.

"Let's go grab our friends and head home, you look sleepy." Jihoon stays quiet but follows as Seungcheol guides him forward.

They separate for a bit to find their friends but agree to meet at the entrance when they're done.

When Jihoon finds Soonyoung dancing, he's managed to find Chan next to him, Seungkwan and Hansol are a few feet away, so he tells them to hold hands as he leads them out of the crowd. Seungcheol seems to have rallied the others similarly. One is always with another, so it isn't as difficult to find them as it is to usher them out and keep track of them.

Eventually, they all end up holding hands like a line of kindergarteners, following Seungcheol to the van.

Jihoon helps each one of the boys into a seat and buckled them in, but realizes that the only empty seats are the passenger seat and the driver's seat. Which means he'll likely be sitting next to Seungcheol no matter what.

The alpha is already taking the wheel, so Jihoon casually seats himself on the passenger side.

The radio plays a soft tune of rap music, but the remaining silence in the air itches as the omega's skin.

"Who's van is this anyway?" He asks, to break the tension.

Seungcheol shrugs, "Jeonghan's, he let me borrow it."

"Oh," Jihoon isn't sure how to follow that up. "You're still friends with Jeonghan—from high school?"

"Yeah. He goes to our school." He glances over at Jihoon, but only for a moment before looking back at the roads. "He's the reason I transferred—he told me about the music programs here and I was sold."

Jihoon nods, humming softly in reply. He amps the volume to the radio and chooses not to keep making conversation. He's not sure what else to say anyway.

They drop the couples off together and then Chan, and when they bring Soonyoung back to his room, it's Jihoon's stop as well.

"I can take him in on my own." He mutters, stepping out of the van. But Seungcheol turns the van off and helps him carry Soonyoung up to their dorm.

The boy isn't as difficult to settle in his bed as Jihoon's previously had to deal with, so walking Seungcheol to the door is awkward and quiet. 

"Thanks for the help, have a good night." Jihoon says, out of common decency, but Seungcheol turns around and hovers in the doorway.

"It's not a problem." Seungcheol bites his lip, looking like he wants to say more.

"What?" Jihoon asks softly, scared of what the other will say.

Maybe he wants to tell Jihoon how annoying it was to take care of his ass too, sitting with him all night, and how he doesn't want to have to do that again. Maybe he wants to tell him how he could tell Jihoon's feelings haven't really changed and that he still is not interested. Maybe he wants to let him down again, reject him a second time because Jihoon has obviously _not_ taken the hint.

"I'm really sorry," Seungcheol says, and Jihoon thinks, _this is it. He's gonna tell me to stop thirsting over his ass and find someone else to bother._

Why is his mind so _fucking_ self-deprecating?

"About earlier, when I told you to let me help you. You might have wanted to go home with someone and I stopped you from doing that. I'm just really protective of my friends, but I shouldn't have forced you to accept my help. You can go out and dance with whoever you want, I shouldn't have done that without asking—"

"It's not like it matters," Jihoon interrupts with a small snort. "Even if I wanted to go home with someone, they—" he cuts himself off before he says anything else. He can't have Seungcheol of all people knowing why he rejects so many people, why he isn't interested in sleeping with just anyone. He really should have just accepted the apology, thanked him again and closed the door. But no. Now Seungcheol is waiting for him to continue that sentence.

" _Someone_ has to be the designated driver, and it would have been near impossible to gather all of the boys if I left you to do it alone." He says instead, his laugh sounding fake to his own ears. "Gotta take one for the team and all that."

Seungcheol looks at him, eyes searching for something from the abrupt pause between the sentences, but Jihoon cannot let him find it.

"But really, thank you for everything. I'll see you around." The omega says quickly, closing the door before Seungcheol can reply.

He waits a few seconds to hear the receding footsteps, but he doesn't hear anything through the door. He sighs, slumping against the door.

He berated himself softly for the slip-up, cringing at how pitiful he sounded moments ago. "No one fucking _asked_ why it didn't matter. He doesn't care; you can't just throw all of your insecurities on him, he doesn't even like you." He whispers, barely audible to himself.

But he hears the footsteps walking away loud and clear.

He groans regretfully, sliding down the length of the door, hoping Seungcheol's sensitive alpha hearing didn't catch what he said.

*

The first thing Seungcheol does when he gets back to his dorm is cringe and fall dramatically, face first, onto his bed.

His heart feels constricted, guilt settling in his gut. Jihoon's words to him seemed dulled from the moment Seungcheol opened the door and turned to apologize.

Like he was waiting for Seungcheol to hit him or something, looking at his feet like a child being scolded.

And even when Seungcheol explained why he was sorry, the omega still looked pained, but more confused than anything.

He tries to think back as far as he can, tries to remember what it is he fucking said the day he rejected Jihoon back in high school, but he can't remember.

Whatever it was, it could be what's changed Jihoon, to be some sort of self-conscious version of what he remembers the other to be, despite the new look.

The old Jihoon was bright, not happy-go-lucky, but he always had this spark in his eyes of amusement whenever his friends did something dumb. He held himself confident, head high, shoulders relaxed. And he smiled more than this Jihoon does.

The dramatic difference cannot possibly be Seungcheol's fault alone, right?

This Jihoon frowns a lot, mutters, and mumbles, and makes himself as small as he can to hide in the shadows. He watches his friends mingle and mess around with a wistful look in his eyes and seems happy—happy _for them_. But _he_ doesn't seem happy at all.

Watching him all night, (protectively, _not_ in a stalkerish way) Seungcheol couldn't help but noticed that Jihoon wouldn't immediately push every alpha away. He let them talk and would do a signature pout in disappointment whenever they said something he didn't like. That's when he would reject them, and Seungcheol desperately wanted to know what it was they said.

Because whatever they said could be the explanation to whatever Jihoon left unsaid earlier.

Whatever he was referring to behind the door—why he didn't think it mattered that Seungcheol sat with him and kept alphas away.

He wants to know, but does he have a right?

_"He doesn't care; you can't just throw all of your insecurities on him, he doesn't even like you."_

He cringes again, heart hurting for the other.

He _does_ like him, he likes him now that they're older, now that Seungcheol can appreciate the omega's qualities more than he did. He's caring and smart, he's seen it in the way he cares for his friends. And he's so fucking talented at producing music, at _singing_ —he excels in their music production class. To top it all off: he's stunning, beautiful, absolutely _gorgeous_ from head to toe.

He does care.

He cares and he knows it's not his place. He can't do this, he can't let himself into the other's life—he doesn't want to hurt him like he did when he was young and stupid and didn't _think twice_ before speaking. Not even when he knows Jihoon likes him too, _especially_ not when he knows the other likes him.

He can't take advantage of that—it just isn't fair of him.

But he can't seem to let go of this—he can't let go of Jihoon. He doesn't want to stay away, he wants to get to know this beautiful person, wants to fix whatever it is he broke three years ago; something that just keeps breaking further, it seems, since that day.

*

_"This next project will be a collaboration between you and a classmate. Groups cannot be bigger than three, but no less than two."_ Jihoon knew that the last statement was directed at him, but he busied himself with doodling on the margins of his notes.

"I will allow you to select your partners, but please remember to choose someone who you will actually be productive with. I will go around the room and ask you who your partner is in a few minutes." With that said, students stood and rushed to their friends. Jihoon stayed put, hoping the teacher would eventually pair him with someone. He isn't worried he'll be paired with Seungcheol because the alpha is quickly swarmed with students who want to work with him.

Reviewing the rubric, Jihoon starts to think of ideas on how to go about the project. He might be able to use some of his previous drafts and edit them a bit to fit the prompt.

"Hey," someone slides into the seat next to him. Jihoon doesn't really even need to hear the voice to know it's Seungcheol, his overwhelming scent identifies him as is.

"Hi?" Jihoon asks, dreading to hear what he thinks he'll hear.

"You wanna work together?" And he can't just say _no_. Seungcheol is his acquaintance, Jihoon has no friends in this class, so there isn't a reason for him to say no when he doesn't have anyone else to work with.

"Yeah." He says simply, trying to sound casual even though it almost feels like he's saying _what choice do I have._

"Cool." Seungcheol beams. "I was really hoping we'd get to work together at some point, your projects are amazing."

"Thank you." Jihoon turns away, unable to keep the blush from rising to his cheeks. "Yours are really good too."

He can't see Seungcheol smile, but he hears it in his voice. "We'll make a great team."

"Choi Seungcheol," the teacher calls out, "who is your partner?" She asks, without looking up from her notes.

"Jihoon." He announces, unaware of the whispers that begin to fly around the room. Jihoon himself almost doesn't notice, too busy blushing at the way the alpha voices his name, rolling off his tongue like it belongs there.

But he can't help hearing the girl to his left, whispering rather loudly. "I bet he's only partnering up with him for his work, who would want to willingly work with that omega." She tuts.

Her partner shrugs, sighing softly like the answer is beyond her. "Beats me, I heard he's really outspoken and bossy. Seungcheol must be desperate to get a good grade for this if he's _volunteering_ to work with him."

As much as Jihoon hates to admit it, it hurts to hear comments like those. So he likes to take charge in the field he's best at, what's wrong with that? It's not like he doesn't take criticism or suggestions on how to improve, and he has always included his previous partners to do equal work.

Seungcheol turns to smile at him while he's thinking; the brightness of his eyes blind Jihoon from anything else. If the alpha was really only using him for a grade, it would hurt like hell. But who's to say he can't just enjoy what he's been given for now?

*

Planning and coming up with fragments of the instrumental doesn't take long. The project is due in two weeks but Jihoon has it all mapped out in his mind, has the melody, Seungcheol has added to it, perfectly flowing his style in with Jihoon's.

Now the hard part is allowing Seungcheol to see his lyrics.

It's difficult because of how personal they are, but as much as he'd like to keep them hidden, they brought this piece to life together and it isn't fair for Jihoon to work on the lyrics all on his own.

He'd told Seungcheol the vague concept of the entire song, which is how they were able to get the melody right. But now Seungcheol has to see the lyrics in their rawest form.

It's terrifying.

"C'mon, you're an amazing composer, I'm sure it's nothing to be embarrassed about." The alpha insists, pouting ~~cutely~~.

"I've wanted to create this piece for a long time," Jihoon admits. "But the melody was all wrong..." he shoves the notebook towards Seungcheol, careful to avoid his eyes. "You can add to them if you want, or edit them. I wrote it a long time ago, it's really not my best work—"

Seungcheol walks around him, walking into the recording booth wordlessly. When he steps up to the mic, he taps at it, grabbing a pair of headphones from around it.

"Play the song," he says, still reading the sheet.

Jihoon frowns but does as told. 

Seungcheol follows the song lyrics as he listens to their instrumental. Jihoon watches curiously.

The alpha wordlessly puts a hand up and Jihoon pauses the audio.

"Play it back, from like a minute into it, around the second verse."

The omega hits play adding a layer quickly before hitting the record button as well, in case whatever Seungcheol is experimenting turns out good.

Humming, Seungcheol waits a moment before leaning up to the mic, singing softly. _"The path that used to be familiar, it's now unfamiliar. Is this the path I know? I ask myself."_

Jihoon stays quiet, even if it's clear Seungcheol is done, but he can't help but wait for the other to keep going. When he doesn't, the omega scrambles to hit the record button again and speak into the mic.

"I didn't know you could sing." He notes. "We should definitely use your vocals." To which Seungcheol laughs, smile bright.

"Don't think so, munchkin. I'm more of a rapper if I'm being honest. But I think my friends would really be great for this song, some of them can sing really well."

Jihoon nods, trying not to think much of the casual nickname, "Bring them in tomorrow, we can test out their vocals and see what we can arrange. It would be fun to try different vocals than Soonyoung's and Seungkwan's."

"We could form a band!" Seungcheol beams.

"Hah." Jihoon laughs. "Knowing your friends and mine, it would be chaos."

Seungcheol walks out of the studio, setting the notebook down on the desk. "Okay. Well, now that we wrapped up the instrumentals, let's go grab some coffee and actual food. I need to eat."

And Jihoon really wants to stay behind to record the demo, but his stomach grumbles embarrassingly loud, which has the alpha laughing, grabbing his wrist to lead him out of the studio. "We'll finish the rest later. We've got plenty of time, munchkin. Besides, I know this really good cafe just up the road with amazing sandwiches."

The thumping of his own pulsing heart resonates in his ears; Jihoon wonders if Seungcheol can hear it, even with the whistling of the wind blowing past their faces. "Yeah, that sounds great." He says a little breathlessly. He blames it on the fact that he struggles to keep up with Seungcheol's pace with his shorter legs, and _not_ because of his flustered state.

Maybe it's because of the cold, or maybe it's because time slows whenever Jihoon is with Seungcheol, but the walk to the cafe seems a lot longer than the few minutes it should take to walk a few blocks up the road.

Arriving at the shop, Jihoon can't help but shiver a little at the change in temperature. He basks in the warmth of the tiny cafe, catching his breath for a moment before going up to the counter to order. 

"Hello, how can I help you... Jihoon?" 

Jihoon diverts his gaze from the menu. "Jisoo?" 

The omega beams in excitement, smile wide and genuine. "Hey!" He greets. "I haven't seen you in so long! How have you been?"

Jihoon isn't the best with socializing, much less with people he wasn't ever truly friends with. They were more of acquaintances back in high school since they had no classes together. "Um." He stutters. "I've been good, what about you?"

"Great!" Jisoo replies. "Wow, you look so different. _Good_ different—wow. I almost didn't recognize you! You look _badass_." 

Jihoon also isn't good at taking compliments, so he just looks away with what he hopes is a grateful smile, "Really? I—thanks. Um. So do you—you look good."

"Aw." Jisoo coos, reaching to pinch Jihoon's face. "There's the cute Jihoon we all know and love. Your piercings can't change that, you know." He jokes. Jihoon strains to smile back.

"Haha," he tries, sounding less than believable. "Um, can I get a frozen chocola—sorry. An americano and a toasted bagel with cream cheese?"

"Sure. Is that all?" Jisoo asks, but before he can reply, Seungcheol slides up beside him and starts to order. Jihoon busies himself by grabbing his wallet, but the alpha steps in front of him before he can pay.

"I've got it, munchkin, don't worry." Jihoon pouts, protesting, but Seungcheol ignores him and pays for both of them.

"Thanks," he says as they walk up to the pick-up side of the counter to wait for their order.

"It's no problem. I invited you, it's only fair _I_ pay." Jihoon shoves at him playfully.

"I'll pay next time." He states but freezes when he realizes he's implied going out to eat with the alpha again in the future.

"I look forward to it." Seungcheol smirks, walking up to grab their order from the employee.

They find a table to situate themselves and dig in almost immediately. Jihoon almost feels bad for starving Seungcheol the way he has, keeping him in the studio all day. But the other doesn't let him dwell on it, filling the silence with pleasant and easy conversation.

Jihoon has never been able to talk to someone he barely knows, so casually. It's nice, but it doesn't help his poor heart whenever he reminds himself that Seungcheol will never be into him the way Jihoon likes the alpha. Especially not after the wake-up calls the universe keeps providing him with.

He tries not to think about that.

*

They wrap up the project, present, and get graded. Jihoon thinks this will be the end of whatever they had going on—Seungcheol has no reason to talk to him anymore.

But the alpha waits for him at the door when class is dismissed. "I can't believe we got a ninety-eight. We worked so hard on that!"

Jihoon tries not to gape when Seungcheol grabs his bag and carries it for him like it's nothing, like he does this every day.

"I mean, we had to put up with all of our friends in one tiny studio, we deserve a perfect grade." He continues.

Jihoon quickly follows after Seungcheol, rushing up to meet his pace. "Ninety-eight is still a good grade." He points out.

"Sure," Seungcheol shrugs. "But you worked so hard, you deserve a hundred."

Trying to hide his blush, he shoves at the older. "We both worked hard on it."

Seungcheol smiles sheepishly. "We should go out to celebrate, even if it isn't a perfect grade."

"Shut up," Jihoon laughs. "I can deal with a ninety-eight. It _is_ worth celebrating."

Raising a brow, Seungcheol smirks. "So you agree to going out for drinks tonight?"

The omega pouts, "I figured we would go out to eat."

"Nope." Seungcheol smiles. "We're gonna celebrate with drinks now, I'm gonna text the group chat." He says, pulling his phone from his pocket. Jihoon rolls his eyes but doesn't protest further.

*

"Seungcheol is gonna be drooling."

Soonyoung sits him down on their couch, reaching for his makeup bag. Jihoon frowns, but Soonyoung ignores it. "Don't give me that look, we're just gonna put a little bit of lip gloss and eyeliner on you. Maybe a bit of blush."

Jihoon tries not to squirm under Soonyoung's scrutinizing gaze as he does as he's told him, applying a light layer of lip gloss over his lips and outlining his eyes with a bit of eyeliner before topping it all off with the tiniest bit of blush along his cheekbones and his nose. "See? That wasn't so bad." Soonyoung pinches his cheek, which Jihoon bats away.

"Are _you_ ready?" The younger asks, standing.

Soonyoung huffs, " _No_ , I was too busy helping your pathetic ass get a man."

" _Which_ ," Jihoon points out. "You really didn't have to. He's already rejected me once," he shrugs. "It's not like he'll change his mind."

Soonyoung groans. "That alpha had no idea what he was missing out on." He starts working on his own makeup. " _But_ he didn't _know_ you then."

Jihoon shrugs again. "That doesn't mean he's attracted to me. People keep calling me _cute_ ," he spits like it's gross. "I've obviously _not_ changed enough since high school, which means I still don't meet his standards."

Soonyoung frowns, closing his makeup bag. He stands up, looking Jihoon in the eyes. "Don't _ever_ think you aren't good enough. If he still doesn't like you, he isn't worth it, Jihoonie. You deserve someone who will see past your looks." He says, more seriously than Jihoon's ever heard him. "Besides, you're really handsome. You could have any alpha wrapped around your finger with a single glance."

Jihoon smiles, looking away from the beta to keep him from seeing the tears brimming at his eyelashes. Curse Seungkwan for rubbing off on him. "Thanks, Soonyoung."

The beta seems to take this as an invitation to hug Jihoon, and as much as he doesn't like being suffocated in a hug, he lets him.

"But don't think," Jihoon mumbles into his shoulder. "That I didn't see the way you were looking at that alpha Seungcheol brought into the studio. He's coming tonight, by the way."

Soonyoung pushes him away, trying to remain composed. "I don't know who you're talking about."

Jihoon smirks deviously. "Oh, what was his name again... Minseok?"

"Seokmin." Soonyoung corrects before he can think twice.

"Right." Jihoon laughs. "So he's coming tonight. Go get dressed so we can go." He slaps Soonyoung's ass, to get him moving. 

Soonyoung turns around, sticking his tongue out childishly. "Just for that, I'm gonna take my sweet time."

*

"I almost thought you bailed on us." Chan whines, draping himself on their shoulders.

"Yeah, well. Soonyoung takes forever to get dressed, blame him." Jihoon says, nudging Chan off his shoulder. "Where are the others?"

Chan almost skips over to the booth where the group is at, leading the way. The boys cheer at their arrival, some clearly drunk, others not far behind, but then there's Seungcheol.

The alpha looks absolutely breathtaking. His black hair is neatly slicked up, exposing his strong brows. There's a black leather jacket over his shoulders, accentuating his broad shoulders and dark features. 

He looks _hot_.

Jihoon can't help feeling the rising heat of a blush creeping up his neck and cheeks. Especially when Seungcheol stares back.

"Jihoon!" Seungkwan cries, going to hug him but only ends up draping himself over Hansol. He's even more of a lightweight than Jihoon. "I've missed you so much, I haven't seen you all day." He cries into the beta's shoulder. Hansol pats his head, pressing a kiss to his forehead to soothe him.

"Aw, you two are so cute." Jeonghan coos. Beside him, Jisoo looks a little torn between trying to do the same and not doing anything at all. On his other side, Seungcheol stands abruptly, stepping out of the round booth and gestures Jihoon to slide in.

The omega tries not to blush as he takes Seungcheol's seat, the alpha sliding in next to him when Jihoon's thighs press against Jeonghan's. Soonyoung pouts, pulling up a chair when he realizes there's no more space at the table.

"We ordered pizza, by the way, one plain and one pepperoni." Jeonghan says, "we weren't sure what you guys wanted on it so hopefully that's neutral enough. But we're probably gonna need to order a third pizza because one slice each will not fill any of you, except maybe Jihoon."

Soonyoung bursts into laughter. "That's really funny, you think Jihoon won't eat his weight in food."

Jeonghan shrugs. "No, I do. That's why I said that."

The guys laugh when Jihoon huffs dramatically, like a child. 

"Aw, he's so cute." One of them says, which has Jihoon pouting.

Seungcheol is laughing beside him, ruffling his hair. 

Soonyoung visibly flinches at the demeaning gesture. And because of how long it took him to help Jihoon fix his hair.

Then the pizzas arrive, which shuts the boys up immediately, as they scarf down slices like rabid animals. Jeonghan orders one more pizza before following the example of the others; only—he eats his pizza like a normal person, at a normal pace. 

With only one slice each, except for the few who snagged a second, the boys work up conversation again until the rest of the food arrives. 

"Seungcheol," Jeonghan says, finishing off the crust of his slice. "You remember that boy Ren from middle school?"

The alpha nods as he wipes his lips with a napkin. "Of course, we grew up together, how could I forget?"

Jihoon's interest peaks, but he remains quiet, nibbling at his remaining food. 

"I saw him in the office the other day. Gave him a tour, actually. He's transferring here." 

Seungcheol's scent changes. It's not something Jihoon tends to notice, Seungcheol's scent rarely changes at all. But it's clear that he's excited about the news and it has Jihoon wondering who Ren is and why he ignites this sudden bout of excitement in Seungcheol. 

He isn't the only one curious, he notes, as Seungkwan questions it out loud. "Who's Ren?"

The alpha smiles, almost wistfully. There's even the slightest blush on his cheeks, but Jihoon is hoping it's the lights of the bar.

"My childhood friend, we were neighbors until he moved away in middle school. We used to be so close—I wondered if I would ever see him again." He mumbles and then more vividly continues. "That's crazy, I can't believe he's transferring here. What are the odds?"

Jihoon has known Seungcheol since middle school, but it must have been after Ren because he can't recall who Ren is.

Jeonghan hums, licking the sauce off his fingers. "Let me tell you, he has had _quite_ the glow-up, Cheol. I mean, I knew you liked him back then, but you should really see him now. And I'm pretty sure he's single, he doesn't have a mating mark or other scents on him besides his own." He adds as if trying to persuade Seungcheol. "He even asked about you."

"What did he say?" Seungcheol asks, leaning forward.

Jeonghan smirks and tilts his head. "Well," he drones, "he asked if _you_ were mated yet. Or seeing anyone."

Jihoon can feel his shoulders fall in disappointment when Seungcheol asks if Jeonghan told Ren the truth, that he isn't seeing anyone.

It's true, but it hurts to hear that Seungcheol seems to be so interested in someone else.

He seems so ready to state that he's single, to someone he was once interested in and he hasn't even seen in years. Just another sobering act that has Jihoon remembering his place in Seungcheol's eyes.

When he's finished the last of his food, Jihoon quietly excuses himself from the table, not without noticing the sympathetic faces Soonyoung, Seungkwan, and Hansol send him. He waves them off and calls it an early night, saying goodbye and extracting himself from the group as quickly as he can.

He thinks what really hurts is that Seungcheol barely even said goodbye in return, so focused on the topic of Ren that Jihoon doesn't even think he heard him excuse himself, even if he dazedly slipped out of the booth so Jihoon could leave.

What was so good about Ren anyway?

*

Jihoon isn't stupid, he knows that if he sticks around Seungcheol any longer, he's bound to get hurt. It's happened in the past and, with the way things are going, Jihoon doubts this time will be any different.

But he knows avoiding the alpha is a lot harder than he expects; he remembers his attempts to avoid the other almost two months ago, at the beginning of the semester.

It seems Seungcheol constantly pops up in random places, whether it be at the grocery store or on campus, sometimes trying to find Jihoon, other times just seeing him coincidentally. It's frustrating because, every time, Jihoon's heart skips a beat at the genuine smile Seungcheol sends him when he sees him, and it's so hard to remember that this boy is going to be his downfall. This alpha is the reason he is going to end up hurt.

"Jihoonie," Seungcheol whines, following after the omega as class ends. "We need to hang out again, it feels like forever since we've gone out together." 

Jihoon ignores the heat rising to his cheeks, looking away from Seungcheol. "I have a lot of work to do."

Seungcheol groans. "You have the weekend to do it." He lightly shoves at Jihoon's shoulder. "Come to dinner with me tonight." He offers. "I made a reservation at this really nice restaurant, I think you'll like it."

Jihoon tries not to get ahead of himself but his heart feels like it's going to beat out of his chest any second now. It's a little sudden, and very much unexpected with the way things went at their last dinner. But if this is Seungcheol's way of casually asking him out, Jihoon finds it endearing.

"I'd love to."

The alpha's eyes sparkle with joy. "Really?" He beams. "Okay, great. I'll swing by and pick you up at seven then." And with that, they say their goodbyes and part ways to their respective dorm buildings.

Jihoon feels something like hope in his chest, a light feeling in his stomach like a million little butterflies fluttering about. He smiles and excitedly runs into his apartment.

"Soonyoung, come help me real quick." He nearly shouts, running into his room.

"What? What's wrong?" The beta asks hastily, stumbling into the room.

Jihoon turns to him with that beaming smile. "I have a date tonight."

*

By the time Seungcheol knocks on his door, Jihoon thinks the butterflies in his belly will make him vomit.

Soonyoung is hyping him up, complimenting him and telling him how the alpha is going to be absolutely blown away by how breathtaking he looks. But Jihoon can't help the odd feeling he gets that something isn't right.

He keeps thinking, keeps going over the way Seungcheol invited him to dinner. It's a date, right? Even if the alpha didn't state it? No one casually asks their friend to a fancy reserved dinner.

Right?

Eventually, he manages to shrug off the doubt, taking in a deep breath and giving himself a quick pep talk in the bathroom mirror before he hears the knock at the door.

"I'll get it!" Soonyoung calls, allowing Jihoon to double (read: milluple) check himself before he walks out to greet Seungcheol.

The alpha is talking to Soonyoung in the doorway, looking ravishingly handsome in a simple crisp, black button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled to his elbows, and a pair of dark jeans that define his long, muscular legs. Jihoon tries not to openly stare at the man's thighs, but god _damn_.

Seungcheol stops in the middle of his sentence as he glances over at Jihoon, mouth hanging open and all. The omega knows he's blushing, feeling his blood rise to his cheeks as Seungcheol's gaze wanders over his own outfit; a pair of blue jeans matched with a black with cherries button-up shirt, a black jean jacket on top. It's far from his usual jeans and sweatshirts or crop tops and sweats, yet he still feels a little too casual, but he's not about to go back and waste time changing into something more formal.

Besides, Seungcheol seems to like what he's wearing, so it shouldn't be an issue.

"You ready to go?" Jihoon asks if only to get Seungcheol's attention. 

The alpha seems to register it a few moments after he's voiced his question, scrambling to reply affirmatively.

Soonyoung practically shoves both of them out the door, and Jihoon is sure the beta will yell at them something inappropriate and embarrassing like: "Wear protection!" But he seems to know how important this date is for Jihoon and instead tells them to have fun and bring him leftovers.

Jihoon smiles gratefully at his friend and closes the door behind him with a nod. 

They walk out of the apartment building and hop into Seungcheol's car, talking casually about everyday things. It's nice, relaxing, something Jihoon's nerves desperately need.

Their conversation eventually fades, Seungcheol amping the radio up a bit to keep the silence from taking over, but they sit pleasantly in the quiet.

When they arrive, Jihoon can't help but notice the quality of the restaurant, it's so _fancy_. Now he's really regretting not wearing something more formal than jeans. But when Seungcheol ushers him inside with a gentle hand on the small of his back and a bright smile, Jihoon forgets all about his outfit; all he can see is the sparkle in the alpha's eyes and the dimples in his cheeks.

When they enter, Seungcheol talks to the host about his reservation, but the beta seems just as blinded by the alpha's good looks as Jihoon is.

"Of course," she stutters when she snaps out of the trance she was in. "Follow me."

She leads them through the restaurant, towards the back booths and gestures to a table where five boys are already seated. Jihoon tries not to let the surprise show on his face when Seungcheol thanks her and greets the boys excitedly.

"Seungcheol!" The tallest of the boys says. "Where've you been, we wanted to wait for you to get here before ordering but you took too goddamn long." He jokes.

The alpha smiles and shoves at the other playfully, "Shut up, Baekho. I had to make a quick stop for someone." He reaches for Jihoon's wrist and tugs him forward. "This is Jihoon, Jihoon these are some of old friends of mine; Baekho, Jonghyun, Aaron, Minhyun, and Ren."

Jihoon follows each name as he gestures to each boy, and finally lands on Ren. The boy is beautiful; he's a stunning omega, and his scent is incredibly relaxing, like fresh laundry.

_This is the omega Seungcheol was so excited about the other day._

Jihoon smiles politely at all of them, trying to stomp on the little flame of hope he had left because it's pretty obvious that this isn't the date he was hoping for. 

In fact, it isn't a date at all, Seungcheol seems to just have invited him—genuinely for the sake of spending more time together. And that's partially Jihoon's fault for distancing himself, but did he really deserve this bad karma?

Yes. He let himself get his hopes up, even though he knew he shouldn't have assumed.

He just missed the alpha so much, his thoughts must have gotten all mixed up.

"Hello," he greets softly, bowing respectfully.

Seungcheol opens his mouth to say something but the pretty omega ( _Ren_ , his brain supplies) is suddenly looking at him with wide eyes, "Oh my god. You're _thee_ Jihoonie?" He laughs before cooing. "Cheolie was right, you are _so_ _cute_."

The words register like a bucket of cold water.

Of course.

How could he forget?

All he is—is fucking _cute_. 

Not _hot_ , not _handsome_ , not fucking _dateable_. 

Especially not in front of the picture-perfect omega; the perfect mate for a strong, handsome alpha like Seungcheol. 

Who was Jihoon kidding? He'll never be the one for him. The one Seungcheol wants.

His smile surely has become some off of grimace/pout hybrid thing, that happens almost reflexively.

"Thanks." He tries to say, but it comes out softer than he hoped. They take their seats, but Jihoon remains standing. "Um. Would you excuse me for a second? I need to use the restroom." They nod and he leaves in search of the bathroom.

When he finds it, he locks the door behind him and fishes his phone out of his pocket. His lip starts to tremble a bit as he makes a call.

"Yello?" Comes Hansol's voice from the other end. Damn, he could have sworn he called Soonyoung. He looks at his phone and the caller ID says Soonyoung.

"Put Soonyoung on the phone." He tells the younger. "Please."

"Are you..." there's a pause as Jihoon tries to contain his sniffle. "Hyung, are you crying?"

"No," Jihoon says immediately. Almost too quickly, but then he hiccups and he knows Hansol heard.

"Are you okay? Hyung, where are you?" The beta asks hurriedly. 

The omega lets out a deep breath, trying not to start sobbing. He doesn't really know how he's feeling, but he also doesn't really know why the hell he's this upset—he's such a goddamn _crybaby_. 

"I— Hansolie, I don't have time to explain. Would you please tell Soonyoung to call me back in ten minutes? Tell him to pretend he needs me home."

"Hyung—"

"Hansol, please," Jihoon begs. "I'm okay, I just—I wanna go home."

The line is silent for a second, but he knows Hansol is still listening. "Okay."

*

Jihoon freshens himself up before leaving the bathroom, trying to calm himself before going back to the table. He can pretend for another ten minutes, he can do it. But the nausea he feels from anxiety says otherwise.

Jihoon eventually sits back down at the table, trying his best to act normal. It hasn't been long since he left for the bathroom, and he did his best to hide the puffiness of his eyes, so they don't question anything. 

Ten minutes drag on, he's sure ten minutes was once much shorter.

Then his phone rings and he picks it up, trying to play it cool, and then concerned when Soonyoung tells him he has to go home quickly because he burnt something. Quickly, Jihoon scrambles to get up and excuse himself. "Soonyoung set something on fire and he's too afraid to put it out himself, I gotta go help him." What a great excuse, thanks Soonyoung.

"Oh. Damn." He almost feels guilty when the alpha looks at him with concern. "Okay, let me know if you need anything. Drive safe." Seungcheol says, watching Jihoon. He's giving him that look again, where he's trying to find something in his eyes. But Jihoon can't let him find it.

"Okay. I've got to go. Bye guys, it was really nice meeting you!" And he's hightailing out of there, footsteps hurried but he makes sure he doesn't run for fear of bumping into a waiter or something.

When he's finally out of the building, he feels like he can breathe again. His anxiety is still high, but he's less panicked. So with a clear mind, Jihoon comes to the realization that he doesn't have a ride. Seungcheol drove him.

But it seems they both forgot since the other told him to drive safely. 

Shoulders falling, Jihoon starts walking in the general direction he thinks they came from. He takes his phone out and searches for his address on Google Maps, but he doesn't get past typing the street name when his phone gives him a ten percent battery warning.

Great.

With his luck and his shitty phone, it's likely to die in a minute or two. So he pockets it instead, not risking it in case he needs to make a call or something. He _could_ call Soonyoung, but the beta has already done enough for him tonight, he really doesn't want to be a bother.

So, with a bit of cash in his pocket, Jihoon keeps his eyes peeled for a bus stop.

He comes across one a few blocks ahead and sets towards it, ready to go home and cuddle with his best friend and maybe cry until he can't anymore. Maybe. Because he's really done that way too many times and Soonyoung worries about him too much.

He's a big boy, he can handle heartbreak. Even if it's the nth time by the very same boy.

It's all his own fault anyway.

He assumed it was a date.

He knew Seungcheol wasn't interested in him like that.

And yet, he let himself believe.

The bus is scheduled to arrive in twenty minutes, but Jihoon isn't sure if he can sit for more than five minutes with thoughts like these drowning him. So he blinks back his tears and starts walking again, headed anywhere because he just needs to get _away_.

He needs to let go.

Walking past the bus stop, Jihoon feels the gentle touch of water hit his cheeks. For a moment he thinks his tears have spilled, but another drop hits his ear, and another his nose.

It's like the universe wanted to add the cherry-on-top, giving him the ultimate cliche.

He powers through the slight drizzle, trying his hardest to fight the frown that tugs at the corners of his lips, hugging himself as the wind begins to pick up a bit and night quickly falls upon the sky.

Unsure of where he's headed, the omega walks around for a while, minutes, maybe an hour; he loses track of time, letting his mind wander.

What would happen if he just disappeared?

If he left, not just the country, but his entire life behind?

Is life worth pain like this?

He's being dramatic, it's the rain and darkness creeping on him. He needs to forget, he needs to drown everything out.

"Hey," a voice says from behind him. It's unfamiliar, but Jihoon hates to admit that he hoped it would be Seungcheol, or maybe even one of his friends, or one of their friends. Instead, when he turns around, he finds a stranger, staring right back at him.

"What's a pretty little thing like you doing all alone this late at night?" It's hardly past eight, maybe early nine pm, but Jihoon could really give a damn about correcting the man. Especially when he calls him 'little'.

They aren't words he hasn't heard before, Jihoon is rather used to it—so he's quick to reject the alpha, truthfully wishing to be left alone.

"Sorry, I'm not interested." He says clearly, trying to sound sympathetic but he sounds annoyed more than anything. He starts to walk away, assuming the alpha is going to back off when he doesn't hear footsteps behind him.

But it isn't that easy; nothing ever is, it appears. 

•••

A few blocks down, Jihoon feels a hand slap over his mouth, seemingly out of nowhere, but he's dragged into the alley it came from, kicking, screams muffled behind the paw of a hand.

He's shoved against a wall, a singular brick sticking out from the wall the slightest bit, digging into his spine. 

In the darkness, Jihoon can't see very well, but he feels someone's breath at his ear, feeling their breath as they whisper. "A pretty little omega like you really shouldn't be alone at night," the voice's owner shoves him harder into the wall. It's the voice of the alpha from before. "Didn't your mama ever warn you about big bad alphas?"

The lips at his ear suck at his earlobe, humming in question, followed by a deep laugh that sends shivers down his spine. "All the big bad alphas that are just _waiting_ for a defenseless little omega to snatch up and teach them a lesson."

Jihoon shoves and kicks, trying to break from the man's grasp, but it only has the man tightening his hold, pushing him even harder against the wall.

"Lesson _one_ :" he continues calmly, as if unbothered by Jihoon's struggles. _"Where do omegas belong?"_

He thrusts a knee between Jihoon's legs, rubbing it against his crotch. "There are two correct answers to this one. A:" He chuckles, grabbing the omega's face roughly in his hand to meet his eyes. _"In an alpha's bed. Bred, full, and stuffed with a good knot."_

Jihoon headbutts him, his forehead colliding with the taller male's with a painful hit. Jihoon himself regrets doing it because it hurts him just as bad and, if possible, he only manages to get the alpha to tighten his hold, growling angrily.

The alpha's sharp canines are on display, which has Jihoon's body quaking instinctually, struggling to fight the need to look away to bare his neck in submission. 

A sharp sound emits from the back of his throat, an odd chirp of fear that the alpha quickly cuts off by squeezing a hand around his throat.

"Shut the fuck _up_." He growls.

But there's a terrifying snarl that comes from the opening of the alley.

The alpha holding him, feeling challenged, puffs his chest out and growls again. "He's mine, back off."

The figure, shaded by the darkness, is undeterred by the threat. _"Let him go."_

The alpha hesitates, wondering if Jihoon is worth all the hassle, loosening his hold a bit and Jihoon almost falls to his knees from the thick cloud of pheromones surrounding them.

_"Now, step away from him. And get the fuck out."_

The alpha growls back, "Or what?"

The snarl that happens sounds terrifyingly animalistic, and if Jihoon wasn't submitting to it before, he's definitely on his knees now, neck bared to both males as he trembles in place. The man beside him huffs, but retreats, running the other way, down the alley and into the darkness of the night.

•••

_"Jihoon,"_ says the figure, but the omega won't look him in the eyes. He's not crazy, everyone knows looking into the eyes of an angry alpha provokes fights, as the alpha feels challenged.

_"Hyung,"_ the voice pleads. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for it to affect you—ahh, Soonyoung is going to kill me." 

Then he's being lifted, into a pair of arms he isn't very familiar with, but the scent alone is enough to make him relax a bit.

_"Seokmin,"_ he whispers, muscles loosening. He takes a deep breath, shuddering, nuzzling into Seokmin's shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, hyung." The arms hug him tighter, it makes him feel safe, cared for. The tears spill over Jihoon's cheeks before he even realizes he was tearing up.

"It's okay," he croaks, hands balling into the younger's sweater. "Just—" his voice quivers. "Just take me home, please."

*

"What the fuck did you do?" An angry Soonyoung growls.

All Seungcheol knows is that it's nearing eleven pm, he just got back home from hanging out with his old friends. They had gone to a bar soon after dinner, had a couple of drinks, and Seungcheol is pretty sure he barely got tipsy. He can't think of anything he could have done wrong.

"What are you talking about?" He scrubs at his face, having tried to fall asleep only a bit ago and successfully managing to get to the point of slipping into unconsciousness before he was rudely woken again. "More importantly, what the fuck are you doing at my front door in the middle of the night?"

Soonyoung is pissed, and Seungcheol has never really seen this side of the boy, but his instincts alone tell him that this beta is dangerous when angry.

The blonde shoves a finger into his chest, pushing him into his apartment.

"Will you kindly explain to me why the _fuck_ my best friend has been crying since he got home?" Seungcheol's brows knit in confusion.

"Jihoon?"

"No, dimwit, Obama." Soonyoung rolls his eyes. "Of course Jihoon, who else?"

"Sorry," Seungcheol says sheepishly before he registers what Soonyoung is asking. "Wait, he's crying? Why?"

" _You_ ," Soonyoung points, "tell _me_. How am I supposed to know what went on during your date? All I know is that Jihoonie called me, upset, and Hansol picked up. Then he told Hansol to tell me to call him in a bit—with an excuse to leave. And _then_ , when I call him to ask where he is so I can pick him up, his phone is dead. Seokmin and I set out to look for him, only to find him being harassed in an alley. So," he stares the alpha down. "Explain."

"What?" Seungcheol's mind is whirling, trying to process what Soonyoung is saying. "Is he okay?"

"He's unresponsive and crying." Soonyoung snaps. "What I wanna know is what made him upset in the first place. So tell me what the hell you did at the restaurant."

The alpha swallows nervously, taking a step back at the look of fury in the younger's eyes. "Nothing! I picked him up, complimented his outfit, you were there! And then we got to the restaurant and met up with my friends; maybe he was overwhelmed by meeting so many people?" 

Soonyoung looks close to facepalming, or hitting him, he isn't sure, but he's leaning toward the latter. "You brought him to dinner with _friends?_ "

Seungcheol nods, unsure of why that matters.

"When you made it sound like a _date_ ; dinner at a fancy restaurant with reservations."

Oh.

"Is that what he was expecting? For it to be a date? Because he didn't have to get upset over it, I would love to take him on a date."

Soonyoung sighs, rubbing his temples anxiously. "No, that can't be it. There has to be something else, Jihoon isn't that dramatic."

Seungcheol purses his lips. "I can't really think of anything else that could have made him upset. But I guess, now that you mention it, I did notice he was pouting at one point—you know, that little pout-frown thing he does." The alpha says with a small smitten smile at the mental image. 

The beta huffs, pacing a bit as he tries to think of things that could explain his friend's behavior. 

"Wait." Soonyoung stops, turning to the other. "He only does that when someone calls him—" he cuts himself off.

"Calls him what?"

But Soonyoung is waving him off. "No, nothing, don't worry about it. It's not important." He goes quiet for a moment before continuing. "Did you by any chance mention his height or anything?" He asks.

Seungcheol tries to think about it, but he honestly can't say he remembers much. "No, I don't think so."

Soonyoung hums. "Well. Then maybe—Who did you introduce to him?"

Shrugging, Seungcheol lists off the names. "Some old friends of mine. Baekho, Aaron, Jonghyun, Ren, and Minhyun."

"Ren, your childhood friend?" 

Seungcheol nods. "Yeah, he was so excited to meet him. He was gushing about how cute Jihoon looked and looks forward to seeing him again."

"'f course." The beta says as if he's figured it out. "That makes so much sense."

"What?" 

For a moment, the beta remains quiet, looking at him like he's stupid and then sighs. 

"Jihoon hates being called cute."

The alpha's brows knit. "Why?"

The younger squints at him like he's trying to figure out how the hell Seungcheol's mind works. "Do you really not remember? High school? What you told him when he asked you out?"

Oh. That's what this is about? 

But it still doesn't add up for Seungcheol, he can't remember what he said then—but why would Jihoon hate being called cute? It's a compliment, is it not?

Soonyoung groans at his confusion. "Because right before graduation _you_ fucking told him that he's cute in a fucking 'puppy' or 'kitten-way'—whatever the fuck that means. And that he isn't dateable. So Jihoon's been incredibly insecure since. He can't help but think everyone who calls him cute thinks they want to treat him like a fuckin cat, not date or sleep with him. And," the beta sighs. "He really fucking likes you, still does— but he thinks you don't like him back because he isn't 'dateable' in your eyes. _And_ to rub salt in his wound, everyone around him, and even your ex-crush or friend or whatever _continue_ to call him cute."

He takes a breath if only to laugh sadly. "He's tried so hard to change, to be everything he wasn't in high school, but it still isn't enough. He thinks he won't ever be enough for you. And I wish he didn't think that." He closes his eyes. "He doesn't need to change just because _you_ don't like him, he doesn't need to change for anybody."

Seungcheol feels the guilt consume him all over again. He knew he messed up in the past, but he never realized it was to this extent.

"Where is he?"

Soonyoung crosses his arms defensively. "It doesn't matter. He isn't responding to anyone right now; I don't blame him. Not when you think about everything he's been through tonight." He sighs, running a hand through his hair. "Just. Give him some space for now, yeah? He needs it. And I think you do too."

With that, Soonyoung turns to leave, the flimsy wooden door closing shut behind him.

*

He isn't home.

He knows he isn't; the scents around him aren't his or Soonyoung's or Hansol's. 

Alarms blare in his head, he isn't home, he isn't in his bed. He isn't safe. 

He feels his heart race, his blood pumps furiously through his veins, and he's on his feet in an instant. He runs for the door, only to find it locked. It's locked from the inside; logically, he knows he can unlock it, but he isn't in the right state of mind to even think about the ways doors open. 

_"Jihoon, relax. You're okay."_ A voice says, but he isn't. He isn't in his bed, he's in an alpha's bed. Not his alpha, not his scent, not his bed. 

He feels tears on his face, feels the burn of his throat with every panicked chirp that squeaks out of it. His breathing is uneven and too fast, he's just so, so scared. He wants to go home.

_"Jihoon, you're okay. I'm here—Soonyoung's here. You're alright. No one else is home."  
_

Soonyoung.

_"Yes. That's right, Jihoonie."_ The voice, Soonyoung, says softly.

Home. He wants to go home.

_"I'm afraid we can't go home yet, Jihoonie. He might come looking for you."_

He wants to ask who, but his heart clenches knowingly. 

Even so, he can't stand being here, trapped by these four walls that reek of alpha. He needs to be home, safe, in his room.

His throat feels like sandpaper, scratchy when he speaks. _"Please."_ He finds Soonyoung's eyes.

The beta's shoulders fall in defeat. "We can't, Hoonie."

Jihoon tries to contain his whimper, but it slips past his lips. He feels needy, whiny, and incredibly pathetic.

Soonyoung stands, sighing and then groaning in frustration. "I hate seeing you like this." He whispers, eyes looking over his weak state with concern, like a worried mother. "Put your coat on." 

Perking up in interest, Jihoon rushes to do as told, quickly slipping into his sneakers as well.

"Okay, let's go." Soonyoung says, opening the door and ushering him out. 

The ride home is silent, but Jihoon can tell the beta is tense with stress. With his sore throat and growing headache, the omega doesn't really want to ask what's wrong. But he has a feeling he knows what it is bugging the other.

When they arrive home, Jihoon makes a bee-line for his room, instincts on overdrive as he begins to pile together blankets and pillows, and anything soft, really. With his own scent.

He stresses about the placement, arranging and rearranging each piece of fabric until he feels satisfied with his work. He settles into his nest, muscles and instincts finally relaxing a bit. He's safer now.

But something is missing.

He tries to ignore it because he knows what it is. He doesn't want to think about it.

So he focuses on all the senses finally coming back to him; warmth, familiar scents, but then there's pain.

There's blooming pain on the skin of his neck, the small of his back, and wrists. There's a cut on his lip, torn open and raw. He's bruised and dirty, and all he can think about is the flashing memories of the night before.

The man, the way his knee wedged between his thighs, the way his fists crushed his wrists, his neck, and that damn brick that dug into the base of his spine. Shaking, Jihoon hiccups, holding himself tighter.

"Shhh," Soonyoung says softly, rushing in as he hears Jihoon's whimpers, smelling his distressed scent from the living room. "You're okay. You're home, you're safe, Hoonie."

But there's just this empty feeling, and this feeling of being confined all at once, overwhelming him. He feels like he's drowning, water suffocating, heavy, and yet so light around him.

His breathing picks up again, uneven, harsh, and fast. He knows he needs to relax, but he's grasping at the thin threads of logic, watching the surface of the water get further and further away.

"Stay with me, Jihoonie. You're doing great, just keep breathing." Soonyoung says, but Jihoon can't find his footing. He can't do it, can't breathe. 

_"Cheol."_ He cries softly, heart hurting because he knows he can't have him.

_He doesn't care, he doesn't want you, Jihoon_.

He cries even harder, he knows it's true, but he hates accepting the fact of the matter.

Soonyoung's voice is miles away, high above water, muffled and unclear. But he knows it isn't directed at him.

_"You better not take advantage of him in this state, I swear if you lay a fucking hand on him in any way that I don't approve of, I'll personally make sure you aren't ever able to have children, am I clear?"_

Jihoon can't decipher what he hears, all he knows is that Soonyoung is speaking, from the hum of his voice.

_"I know. I'm just—I'm worried. He's never had a panic attack this bad. I just don't know how else to help him."_

Silence.

_"Just get here as fast as you can, okay? His breathing seems to have relaxed a bit but it might pick up again—okay, yeah. Thanks. See you soon."_

Jihoon feels his head get lighter, his eyes fluttering, and he feels the strong need to close them altogether.

_"Jihoon? Stay with me. You'll be alright, don't worry."_ But Jihoon is already succumbing to his sudden sleepiness, closing his eyes.

*

He looks so fragile. So tiny in his curled form. Vulnerable.

His pale skin is littered with bruises in the shape of hands; around his delicate neck, his thin little wrists, his chin. His lips are red, a vivid color from the blood rushing to the cut on the side of his bottom lip.

Seungcheol's heart clenches, from guilt and pain from just looking at his Jihoonie.

He wishes he could go back in time, just twenty-four hours. All of this would have been avoided if he just wasn't so fucking dumb.

He remembers that day now, remembers telling Jihoon how he wasn't his type, was 'too cute' to seem attractive in his eyes.

He can't disagree more with his younger self.

The boy before him looks as soft as a kitten, an injured one, but one he wants to take home and care for all the same. He wants to protect him, wants to cherish him. How the hell could he ever think otherwise?

Soonyoung told him he's been out for ten minutes, falling unconscious after hyperventilating. Seungcheol thanked him as he headed out, not without hearing another threat from the younger. He knows he deserves it, but he doesn't plan on hurting Jihoon anymore. Not when he knows now what he did wrong, what he has to apologize for.

He takes off his shoes, shrugs off his coat, and slides into the bed, spooning Jihoon carefully. He slides his arm over the smaller's waist, pulling him a little closer, trying to calm his own instinct to protect the other.

The smaller boy shuffles in his sleep, but his distressed scent instinctually relaxes a bit in the presence of an alpha he's more comfortable with.

Seungcheol sighs in relief, glad he didn't make the boy even more upset than he already has.

But then the omega's body tenses as he blinks awake, now aware of Seungcheol's thick scent. It can only mean that the other is close by. He can feel the heat against his back.

When Jihoon realizes this, he scrambles to the edge of the bed, turning hastily, which causes him to flail as he falls off the edge. He hits the floor with a whimper but is quick to recover and scooch to the far end of the room; away from Seungcheol.

He looks even smaller now, curled into himself, hugging his legs close to himself.

"What are you doing here?" He asks, softly, oh so softly. Seungcheol's heart clenches in sympathy.

"I—Soonyoung," he winces as he brings up Jihoon's best friend's name. "Told me what happened. I wanted to see if you were alright."

Jihoon frowns, lifting his chin from where it hides behind his knees. "I'm fine." He says sharply. "But why are you," he pauses. "In my bed?" He mumbles, cheeks flushing an adorable pink.

Seungcheol feels his own face heat up at the wording of the omega. "You were distressed, your scent was really strong—and I feel responsible for what happened, so I felt I should try to comfort yo—"

"It's not your fault." Jihoon interrupts, looking away. "I chose to walk home, I knew the risks. You had nothing to do with it."

He's hiding his real feelings from him. Seungcheol feels even worse, knowing now—remembering now what he did in the past and how Jihoon's been hiding it from him, maybe suppressing for his own sake as well.

"It is." He says gently, dipping his head to find Jihoon's gaze. "You know it is. I—" he stops, thinking through his words.

"I know I messed up. I led you on and I didn't mean—"

— _for it to happen this way._

"I know. That still wasn't your fault. _I_ was the one who thought it was a date." Jihoon whispers, eyes shining with tears.

"How could you not? The way I invited you made it seem like one. Hell, I would have assumed the same." Seungcheol tries for humor, laughing at his own words, but it only has the omega curling into himself even more.

Jihoon sniffles softly, trying to swallow back his tears. "I'm sorry."

The alpha's lips tug downward. He gets on the floor and slides toward the smaller.

When the other still avoids his gaze, he sighs.

"Listen," he begins gently. "Soonyoung told me—he reminded me about what happened between us in high school." Immediately, Jihoon tenses, turning his face like he's going to get hit or scolded. It hurts to see him react this way.

He lets the silence linger, hoping Jihoon will say something, anything. He doesn't.

"I was wrong."

The silence remains, but Jihoon's expression of fear slips into a look of confusion.

"I was wrong." Seungcheol repeats. "You _are_ cute," Jihoon flinches, lips puckering into his signature disappointed pout. 

Seungcheol almost wants to laugh again, endeared by the pout. Instead, he ducks his head, still searching for Jihoon's beautiful eyes, placing a finger under his chin to face his face towards him.

"You are absolutely adorable." He whispers. "But I have no idea what the hell I was thinking when I said you weren't dating material." He says honestly. "I just want to cuddle with you, hold you close, keep you safe, kiss you."

Jihoon tries to suppress his surprised squeak, but when it slips out, he blames his stupid omega instincts and absolutely does _not_ blush.

Seungcheol is certain he's never seen a prettier sight.

"When you smile," The alpha continues. "I want to give you everything beautiful and happy the world has to offer just to see it happen again." Jihoon bites his lip, tears now brimming in disbelief.

When a single tear slips down his cheek, Seungcheol wipes it away. "I wanna lay you down, kiss you all over, worship your beauty. You're _stunning_."

Jihoon shakes his head. "No." He says at last. "You were right. I'm really not dateable." He laughs depreciatingly. When Seungcheol tries to interject, the omega cuts him off.

"I've tried to find partners, I've spent years trying to actually find a boyfriend. But every time someone shows interest, it's because they want to sleep with me. They like that I'm small, they think I'm younger than I look because I'm cute." He chuckles. "I even tried to go for a bad boy look to try to look hot, for once. But even then, people pat me on the head or squish my cheeks. You were right."

Seungcheol shakes his head. "No. No, I was wrong. They don't appreciate you, they don't know you. If they did, they would stop to look at the bigger picture. And I think that was my mistake in high school too. I didn't even know you," he frowns. "I had no right to do that; to take one look at you and say what I said. You _are_ dateable. And I would very much like to take you on a date. A real one, with no one else." He smiles sheepishly, teeth shining brightly, dimples creasing.

Jihoon pokes at them because he's restraint himself for too long.

"I feel like I'm getting whiplash with the way this night has gone," Jihoon says, eyes fluttering in exhaustion. "Could you give me some time to think about it?"

Seungcheol nods, getting sleepy from just watching the omega's eyes blink tiredly. "Of course."

Jihoon smiles softly and proceeds to throw his arms out, making grabby hands. "Take me back to bed."

He sounds so cute, Seungcheol can't hide his endeared smile. He reaches for the smaller, scooping him up and placing him gently on the bed, tucking him in. And if he places a gentle kiss on his head before retreating, Jihoon doesn't know because he's out as soon as his head hits the pillow.

*

He's home. He's in bed, in his nest made from his own blankets, and his inner omega is finally at peace because there's this wonderful warmth at his back that gently rocks with each breath he takes. Jihoon's never felt more relaxed.

As he wakes, more of his senses do as well. His eyes flutter awake, taking in the light yellow of the sun illuminating his bedroom through the sheer curtains. Yawning, he takes in a deep breath and catches the scent of an alpha—suddenly, he remembers.

_Seungcheol_.

The body aches are much less pleasant than the feelings his other senses have awoken him with, but he isn't as concerned with them as he is with the reminder of the alpha in his bed. Who, as if he could read his mind, wraps an arm around Jihoon. Gently, but firmly. Keeping him in place.

The omega struggles not to preen at the display of ownership, but his instincts kick in before he can tame them. Purring softly, he settles into the embrace, right below Seungcheol's chin.

The alpha nuzzles his nose into Jihoon's hair, who feels him wake slowly. Shifting quietly, Seungcheol places a small kiss into the omega's hair before whispering. "Jihoonie."

Jihoon tries not to tense, tries to pretend he was sleeping this whole time and unaware of the cuddling session they're having. Mainly because he doesn't really want to part just yet, but he tries to convince himself that it's because he's embarrassed to be caught enjoying it at all.

"Jihoonie," Seungcheol tries again. "Wake up, munchkin."

Thinking back to every time his mother would try to wake him when he was only pretending to be asleep, he tries to summon those acting skills now; stretching lazily, smacking his lips together slowly, groaning softly.

Seungcheol coos, snuggling him harder up against his chest and Jihoon chokes a little as breathing becomes more difficult.

_"Cheol."_ He chokes out, tapping the alpha's arm.

With an amused laugh, Seungcheol loosens his hold. "Sorry. I couldn't help it. You're just so cute, I just wanna _squish_." He pulls back slowly, eyes watching Jihoon with a sort of mesmerizing awe that has the omega blushing.

Muttering something about not being cute has Seungcheol laughing again and kissing his forehead. "Of course not, you're the fiercest kitten out there."

Jihoon pouts again but can't say he's really bothered by the comparison.

Seungcheol leans down a bit, their noses touching. "You're my little kitten and I love it."

They both feel it, the simple _"I love you"_ that follows unspoken, but it seems like it's too soon. They aren't even officially together, Jihoon hasn't even agreed to that date yet. But they both know it's true.

Seungcheol smiles, dimples caving. "Let's go make breakfast, do you have strawberries?"

Jihoon feels his own lips break into a smile. "I think so."

Humming, Seungcheol presses one more kiss to the omega's forehead before pulling away and sitting up. "Good because I make some mean strawberry pancakes."

Snorting, Jihoon follows him to the bathroom to wash up. It feels oddly domestic after everything that's happened, but he likes it. It feels natural like this is where they are meant to be.

When they're done, they end up in the kitchen together, creating a mess of pancake batter and fruits but end up with some amazing food, sitting on the couch watching Netflix.

Jihoon knows he doesn't owe the alpha an answer to the date question yet, but he can't help but want to say yes right now. Seungcheol is being so kind and understanding, it isn't hard to remember why it is he likes him so much. The other looks over at him for a moment, as if he knows that he's thinking of him.

"Cheol," Jihoon says, "about the date—"

"I'm gonna stop you right there." Seungcheol interrupts but quickly goes on to add. "I have a lot to make up to you first, so you don't need to give me an answer straight away but I'd like to earn my forgiveness before anything. And if you don't want to forgive me either, that's cool too. You don't have to go out with me or accept my apology at all if you don't want to."

Jihoon feels his breath hitch. It's like he could really read the omega's mind, how precisely he narrowed the topic.

"I know but," Jihoon pauses for a second, biting his lip pensively. "You really don't have to, it wasn't your fault really. I misunderstood and let it get to my head—"

Seungcheol reaches out to hold his hands. "No, hey. None of that. It _was_ my fault, and I'm going to make it up to you until I earn your forgiveness—only if you want that, of course. If you want me to just leave you alone, that's okay too."

Blushing, Jihoon looks away from his eyes. "I really like you Seungcheol." He stutters. "I have for a long time now and that hasn't changed. Even now." He looks back at the older's face to see his reaction. "And I think we both had a hand in what happened altogether," he chuckles. "So I forgive you."

"No," Seungcheol says calmly, smiling softly. "I want to make it up to you, really. Court you and everything, do it right this time."

Jihoon starts to protest but Seungcheol silences him by pressing their lips together. It's gentle and relaxing, like the flow of a steady river, and it's everything Jihoon's ever wanted. He feels cared for and safe from just one kiss. And when Seungcheol pulls back for a second, a Jihoon is quick to throw his arms around his neck and pull him back in for more.

Parting his lips, Jihoon traces Seungcheol's lips with his tongue, sucking gently on the thick bottom lip before releasing it and pulling away.

A little out of breath, Seungcheol smiles brightly.

Jihoon can't help but laugh at how whipped he looks, there are stars in his eyes and everything. It's rather endearing. He presses one more kiss to the older's lips before snaking out of his hold to the kitchen. Seungcheol chases after him, catching him by the waist, and he lets out a surprised squeal.

"How do you expect me not to run after you when you kiss me like that?" He questions breathily into his neck. Jihoon can feel the curve of his smile as he presses a gentle kiss into the sensitive skin there.

"You wanted to work for it didn't you?" Jihoon asks cheekily.

Seungcheol laughs. "I guess that is what I said didn't I?" He hums. "I'll do anything you want me to do if it means I get to kiss you again."

Shaking his head, Jihoon leans back into his embrace. "You shouldn't make promises like that. I'm _this_ close to make you wash the dishes by yourself." He jokes.

"If that's what it takes—"

Jihoon laughs, turning around in his arms. "I'm kidding, you dummy. Come here." He tilts Seungcheol's head down a bit as he tiptoes to reach his lips. He tastes of strawberries and coffee. They part when Seungcheol can't stop smiling into the kiss, but he can't say he minds when he sees the light pink dusting his cheeks and the sheepish grin the alpha wears.

"Both of you are too cute, what the fuck." Soonyoung groans, having just gotten home. He walks right back out of the kitchen, voice resounding as he grabs his keys and makes his way out again. "You better treat him right, Cheol. I still stand by what I said last night."

When the door closes and the silence takes over once again, Jihoon bursts into laughter. Seungcheol looks a little torn by Soonyoung's threat and a little endeared by the omega's laugh.

"You're the cute one out of the two of us." Jihoon gives him one last peck on the lips.

**Author's Note:**

> i thought about changing the title to “too cute” but that immediately made me cringe, I used the word cute way too much in this fic as it is
> 
> the title is from halsey’s song [ Graveyard ](https://youtu.be/rPgaYeq9NvI)
> 
> I know this fic kinda sucks but I hope it wasn’t too much of a waste of your time :)))


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